Something new and exciting to help keep you warm through the northern winter.

 

Before I get started on today’s little tummy tickle I have a public apology to make.  It seems inevitable that I will be a featured space soon (I’m not apologising for that, you did it).  But I suspect it’s inevitable that some of my new visitors will leave comments.  Being a person who is obsessed with being accepted by all who meet me, I will feel obliged to visit each and every person’s blog and undertake meaningful conversations with all of them.  If my commenting on your posts goes a little quiet for a while that is the perfect point for you to insert my apology (so just hang on to it until you need it).  But remember, you will always be able to say you knew me before I was famous.

 

And now for today’s show.

 

I’ve noticed something about the northern winter.  Lots of things go into hibernation.  The sun, a vast number of animal species, motivation for outside activities… I put 2 and 2 together and got… uuummmmm… whatever you get in the seventeenth dimension when you add single digit numbers.  But I also noticed another thing that goes into hibernation during the northern winter.  Sweepstakes.  Fatty has given up the weight loss and is hoping to tread water until the thaw.  Nikared is neck deep in exams but claims he’ll be back in a couple of weeks with his competition tagging faithfully along behind.  It’s looking like a long cold lonely winter ahead.

 

So to keep everyone on alert during the cold weather – hands up, who wants me to start a sweepstakes?

 

Bear in mind, if this goes ahead there will be one subtle difference:

 

Due to the budget constrains imposed by my being a student trying to support a family of 5; it will be a cheap fragile useless prize.  And if you live outside the continental OZ you will have to pay your own postage (ask fatty, near on twenty bucks for a little box of biscuits).  So it will probably work out cheaper for me to just suggest a piece of junk and you can go to a local $1 shop and pick yourself up half a dozen.  Of course if, after picking up your reward, you like it, I would expect suitable praise making broad reference to my global benevolence and worldwide network of caring and sharing.

 

Maybe it would be better if the prize was not a financial one.

 

Maybe the prize could be me being your blog-slave for a period of time.  I have to leave flattering or sub-servient comments on demand (beware of the backhanded compliments).

 

Or the winner gets to nominate my blog heading/topic for the next (say) 3 posts.

 

So there’s really only one thing left hanging.  What will I do?  Literally.  What would you vultures like to see me suffer through?  I have started a boring list of generic clichés to get the ball rolling.

 

#1.  Exercise kilometres (miles for you un-metric ruffians) – if you must include a distance requirement, remember I tell good stories but they are all over 15 years old and my riding has been at or under 2000 kilometres (1200 miles) per year since then.

 

#2.  Losing weight (there’s a good 45 kilograms [100 pounds] my wife thinks I don’t need).

 

#3.  Counting calories (same miserable reason as above)

 

#4.  Waxing the hairs on my feet –or– plucking them one at a time (I’m certain brooklyn will vote for this one but I’m not sure if it’s a contest or a prize).

 

So there are 2 things to be resolved here.  What is the challenge?  And.  What is the prize?

 

 

My permanent post script.

 

If you love your fellow man but aren’t sure how to display your love, visit here to discover how easy it is to help.